Lucy in the Sky: How the Devil Killed My PS3

on June 30, 2010 7:23 PM

Lucy in the Sky: How the Devil Killed My PS3

A little under a year ago, I was sitting back in my bedroom on my Playstation 3, playing the brand new title by Naughty Dog, Uncharted 2: Among Thieves. It wasn’t even its 3rd day on the shelves yet, when out of nowhere my console just powered down. “What the hell? Are you seriously going to pull this crap with me right now?”, I screamed out in agony, as I frantically tried to turn poor “Lucy” back on, but nothing. I tried several times, but still she wouldn’t budge. Nothing but the sound from the fan as it tries to boot up, then a “beep beep” noise, then the Yellow LED of Death, then the console shuts down.

You can guarantee that I gave my console “the Big Eff You,” double-fingered and everything. It’s really awesome to be sitting on a $300 piece of plastic and hardware, but I guess that it was bound to happen. Especially since some days I can play for six plus hours. You can verify with my ex-girlfriend on that one. Hah. I guess maybe that’s why she is an ex, right?

This was my second Playstation 3 that I had owned. The Blu-Ray drive in the first one had stopped working after 4 months! So yeah, I cried like a little girl with a skinned knee. It was a horrible day. I didn’t know what to expect when this happened. All I could do was worry about how I was going to be able to get my fix of gaming. I was expecting some financial aide money in a few weeks, but I couldn’t wait that long. So, I called my mother and said in the best Cartman voice I could, “Mom, can you buy me a new Playstation 3. I’ll love you forever!” Hah. Yeah, she loved me that day, but unfortunately I wasn’t able to get it right that second and had to wait until the next evening. But hey, at least that is better than two weeks.

The next night, my mother came home from work with my brand new PS3 Slim, and by God was I excited like a kid in a candy shop. The Slim was so slender, and much much quieter than my 40gb console that I had previously. After I set the new console up, I was looking at all of my trophies, when this was noticed…

Lucy in the Sky: How the Devil Killed My PS3

You’ve got to be joking, right? The last trophy that I had received before Lucy’s demise was trophy number six hundred and sixty-six, wow. I couldn’t believe my eyes; I totally thought that I was in a parallel universe where I was hated by everything and everyone. Was it Uncharted 2 that bricked my console? Was it my massive amounts of game playing? Could it have been that the devil had possessed my system and wanted to rip the very essence from my body that allows me to live (and yes, I’m talking about gaming). It was surreal for me that coincidentally my Playstation 3 dies after receiving trophy #666. It must have been fate, I guess; now realizing that Lucy was short for Lucifer all along. Stupid devil, you killed my PS3.

 /  Staff Writer
Marked until death with the words "Gamer" across my back (literally) with Duck Hunt pistols across my shoulder blades. Tyler enjoys good beer, open-world games and is also a singer/songwriter.