Do you hate yourself? Is this hate only offset by the addition of geese into your life that feed into your self-hating masochism? Well, it just so happens that the first and only app you'll ever need is available right now -- for free.

The latest turn in the world's ever-expanding embrace of the honking menace is a free app made by Twitter user @SamNChiet. If you haven't gotten the gist by now, he has made an app that puts a lil' goose friend on your screen. This goose can do all sorts of things like run around your screen tracking mud everywhere, for instance. But don't poke him, don't bother him, and for your own sake, don't make him mad.

He's a goose, and so besides being downright adorable, well, he does goose things. Sure, the mud is a little annoying but nothing compared to say, stealing your mouse. Or dragging goose-based memes on your screen. Or stealing your mouse while you're in the middle of a game and getting shot at. The goose is a wonderful bugger when he's not making your life hell. And he'll be doing that a lot.

The app itself is appropriately titled Desktop Goose and once again, is available for free. It also has arrived just months after the release of Untitled Goose Game from House House, which surely is no coincidence.

So, I must reiterate, do you hate yourself? Do you want to ruin your computer experience? Do you want to install this app on every computer at work and watch the office go up in flames? Then download Desktop Goose here. And if you're looking for other, non-digital forms of goose, earlier today we wrote about one that you can check out here.