Culture

Jimmy Kimmel Tried to Terrorize Children Playing Fortnite, Making Him an Enemy of Gamers

Fortnite gamers rise up!!!

By Logan Moore

December 14, 2018

My fellow gamers, it’s time to pick up your Joy-Cons, your DualShock 4, your Xbox Elite Controller, or a keyboard and mouse and unite against a common cause for the first time ever.

On the most recent episode of Jimmy Kimmel Live, host and so-called “funny man” challenged parents around the country to turn off their children’s TVs all while playing the greatest game known to man, Fortnite, and then see how they’d react. Of course, we gamers know that this act is one of Ten Commandments of Gaming Sins, which were originally brought down from Death Mountain by Shigeru Miyamoto in 1986 — so of course, the kids didn’t respond too fondly.

The video that Kimmel disgustingly released featured young gamers screaming and some fighting their parents back both verbally and physically — all appropriate reactions in a heated gaming moment. Kimmel himself seemed to find this all hilarious, even though it’s anything but. When you’ve just dropped at Tilted Towers and you’re trying to pull off sick headshots like our boy Ninja, the last thing you need is your parents interfering. As one kid in the video put it, get back in the kitchen and cook!

As for what should be done with Kimmel, I think he should be brought to Gaming Court for his actions. Making gamers the laughing stock of your nightly show is an actionable offense, and action is what we should take. Someone call Phoenix Wright and get him on this case right away. We need to lock Kimmel away with other of the gaming war criminals like Jack Thompson.

You can see Kimmel’s video below if you want to see just how egregious of an action this is. It’s time we take a stand against matters like this and prove that you shouldn’t tread on us. After all, we gamers are the most oppressed group of all.

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Editor’s note: This article is clearly written in jest. Gamers, please don’t rise up and leave Jimmy Kimmel alone.

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Logan Moore
@MooreMan12

Logan Moore is the Managing Editor around these parts and enjoys the video game Super Mario Odyssey.

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