In one of its more senile moments, Electronic Arts has decided that Tetris, a game that they own the rights to but has been been out since 1984, could use a Content Pass. In order to get on the fun, you just need to sign up for the “T-Club.” Of course, exclusive membership in the “T-Club” is not free, rather, after you purchase the new Tetris App for $0.99 for iOS, you can then choose to pay your dues either monthly or yearly.
Yep. You can pay $2.99 per month or $29.99 per year for the privilege. What does membership in the “T-Club” get you? Well according to Giant Bomb, it gets you things like “exclusive discounts and content, premium Tetris Log challenges, and a booster to progress [your] Tetris Log faster.” I’m not exactly sure what a “Tetris Log” is or why you’d want to booster your progress faster, but for $30 a year, it is probably particularly awesome.
In all seriousness, who thought this was even remotely necessary? I mean other than some accountant or marketing exec at EA with a team of yes-men. It’s Tetris, you charge a dollar for it and then let me delete lines until I launch a rocket. It is a game that has reached the point where it is timeless enough to not require “extra-content” that needs a subscription service. I like to imagine that Pac Man is next in line for an Online Content Pass that gets him new items like the Proton Pack to help him get rid of those pesky ghosts. Wait, that would actually be awesome.